My dearest dearest house
It is getting very close now to the time when I have to leave you, when we part company forever. You have been my sanctuary and my nemesis for over 20 years now and leaving you is such a wrench. I know so much of me is imbedding in you I fear I may leave too much of me behind. But no, I shall leave you to enjoy your new residents. Their youth and enthusiasm will fill your rooms with life and laughter and optimism once again.
I tried to leave you many times before but just could not conceive of any possibility of being able to find anywhere else so perfectly positioned and so delightfully unique in your qualities to move to. In fact, I doubt I shall be able to afford anything as wonderful as you. But you do have your down side and despite all your plus points I can no longer live in such a cold and damp climate and in such isolation anymore. Most of our time together has been spent just surviving. Your upkeep has been a full time task which initially was a joyful experience but as the years have rolled on I can see it robbing me of opportunity to do other things. It is a big leap of faith for me, and funnily enough it will be an identical leap of faith that brought me here in the first place. I have no idea where I am going. I just know that I must go.
It was a good decision all those years ago. From here, in your embrace, I have found myself. It took a long time but during those years we shared the excitement as you protected me from the ravages of the wild weather, you lovingly opened your doors to cherished friends and warmed my heart in the winter firelight. When the summers were long and warm you breathed easy allowing the gentle breezes to waft through your open windows to air your rooms. We sat together in the quietness enjoying the changing seasons, observing the wildlife and indulging in every sunset and starry night.
Now I am leaving you, my sanctuary, my little piece of heaven and maybe a little part of me. I must be mad. In fact, most folk think that I am mad. But things change, I must go and I must go now.
Every now and then a sense of grief hits me, tears at me deep within. When I started this process, I had no idea it would be this painful. Memories flood my being. Dreams fulfilled that I will leave behind, just a memory to fade with time. Dreams unfulfilled hopefully left behind, praying they will dissolve into the ethers never to torture me again.
If the people that are to dwell within your walls have half as much joy as we have experienced, they will have a happy time here. I know you will nurture them as you did with me and those that came before me.
Goodbye my dear friend, I will always remember you, ballads may even be written about you as I share our cherished memories in the years ahead of me.
I want to express my deepest gratitude to you but words seem so hollow, but I know you know. The time we have spent together has been so short in the greater scheme of things, a mere blink of an eye. But to me in my humanness, it has been so full, so varied and eventful.
Yes, there will always be a place in my heart where you reside, for I could never ever forget you.
With deepest love