Day 18: A map as your muse

St Kilda
Oh my dearest St Kilda
I don’t know why
but
You draw me
You lure me
To visit your shores
To sit in your stillness
As those gone before
And breathe in your beauty
And link into the life
That not long ago thrived

But to reach you
I have
To endure many hours
Of pounding the Mighty
Atlantic waves
A feat that I cannot
Just quite yet endure
But one day
Yes one day
I’ll journey to you
Of that I am sure!

Images taken from:

http://www.kilda.org.uk/

http://weepress.co.uk/index.php/st-kilda-cleits-and-cliches/

http://www.kilda.org.uk/frame8.htm

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Change – Seasonal Changes of the Cuillin Mountains, Isle of Skye

In response to The Daily Post’s weekly photo challenge: “Change.”

Day 17: Mine your own material

Ah leaving things behind!

This is such an emotive topic for me in many ways but one which is so prevalent just now is my house move.

Well, I have moved out of my house/home and put my possessions in storage because I have not yet found another home to move into just yet.

The last time I had a big move was almost 10 years ago. I’ve had lots of mini moves, living out of boxes and suitcases within that 10 year period but a big upheaval that tugs at the heart strings, no. This is the first in 10 years.

The last one was a massive shift. My son was leaving home and my dad was dying. I knew I needed to be with my dad who lived a day’s drive away and didn’t want to be too far from reaching my son who was two days drive away. So a move was a must.

I left everything bar the bare essentials behind. I had no idea how long my father would live but his condition was terminal this time and I had a deep knowing that he was going to leave us.

My attitude at the time was one of urgency. I had to move and I had to move fast.
I gave up my business and other commitments. Said adios to my friends and colleagues.

Put my house on the market and headed south.

My thoughts at the time were so positive. You only get one chance to be with a cherished person when they are dying. When they are gone, they are gone. Forever. You can get your life back later.

Ten years later, I am just getting my life back.

I had three months with my dad before he died. I have no regrets; it was a wonderful experience I shall cherish until the end of my time.

Getting my life back was a much bigger ordeal!

Day 10: Update your readers over a cup of coffee

If we were having coffee right now we would probably be discussing the quality of the coffee. Being a decaf drinker but still liking my coffee to be a stiff drink, I would be giving you my take on its taste and aroma.

If we were having coffee right now I would be sharing with you my joy of the weather we are having. How it brings back cherished memories of other Septembers when the weather was similar and we were all having fun haymaking.

If we were having coffee right now we would be chatting about how my packing is coming along and whether I am still calm and organised or beginning to quake under the strain. We would be discussing ways we would keep in touch with one another when I move and when I would be likely to return to visit.

If we were having coffee right now I would be enthusing about my imminent move and what my plans were for my immediate future. We would chat about what you were going to do with your time over the coming winter months and ways you too could move to a warmer climate.

If we were having coffee right now we would be looking out of the window watching the tourists wandering aimlessly around and chat about the impending quietness the end of season brings.

Day 9: Reinvent the letter format

My dearest dearest house

It is getting very close now to the time when I have to leave you, when we part company forever. You have been my sanctuary and my nemesis for over 20 years now and leaving you is such a wrench. I know so much of me is imbedding in you I fear I may leave too much of me behind. But no, I shall leave you to enjoy your new residents. Their youth and enthusiasm will fill your rooms with life and laughter and optimism once again.

I tried to leave you many times before but just could not conceive of any possibility of being able to find anywhere else so perfectly positioned and so delightfully unique in your qualities to move to. In fact, I doubt I shall be able to afford anything as wonderful as you. But you do have your down side and despite all your plus points I can no longer live in such a cold and damp climate and in such isolation anymore. Most of our time together has been spent just surviving. Your upkeep has been a full time task which initially was a joyful experience but as the years have rolled on I can see it robbing me of opportunity to do other things. It is a big leap of faith for me, and funnily enough it will be an identical leap of faith that brought me here in the first place. I have no idea where I am going. I just know that I must go.

It was a good decision all those years ago. From here, in your embrace, I have found myself. It took a long time but during those years we shared the excitement as you protected me from the ravages of the wild weather, you lovingly opened your doors to cherished friends and warmed my heart in the winter firelight. When the summers were long and warm you breathed easy allowing the gentle breezes to waft through your open windows to air your rooms. We sat together in the quietness enjoying the changing seasons, observing the wildlife and indulging in every sunset and starry night.

Now I am leaving you, my sanctuary, my little piece of heaven and maybe a little part of me. I must be mad. In fact, most folk think that I am mad. But things change, I must go and I must go now.

Every now and then a sense of grief hits me, tears at me deep within. When I started this process, I had no idea it would be this painful. Memories flood my being. Dreams fulfilled that I will leave behind, just a memory to fade with time. Dreams unfulfilled hopefully left behind, praying they will dissolve into the ethers never to torture me again.

If the people that are to dwell within your walls have half as much joy as we have experienced, they will have a happy time here. I know you will nurture them as you did with me and those that came before me.

Goodbye my dear friend, I will always remember you, ballads may even be written about you as I share our cherished memories in the years ahead of me.

I want to express my deepest gratitude to you but words seem so hollow, but I know you know. The time we have spent together has been so short in the greater scheme of things, a mere blink of an eye. But to me in my humanness, it has been so full, so varied and eventful.

Yes, there will always be a place in my heart where you reside, for I could never ever forget you.

With deepest love
Loi x